Every journey begins with a single step...

ABOUT THERAPY

Life is full of ups and downs, and getting some professional support during the tougher times can make all the difference. Sitting alone with our worries and pain can feel unbearable, yet when we share them within the safety of a warm and trusting relationship, things start to feel more manageable. I’d like to reassure you that whatever you bring to counselling, I will provide a warm, compassionate and respectful space where we can explore your thoughts and feelings together without judgment, going at a pace you feel comfortable with.

Perhaps you want to talk to a counsellor in order to come to terms with something that has happened to you, or maybe you feel your problems run at a deeper level - unexplained feelings or unhelpful relationship patterns, for example. Psychotherapy is about getting to know yourself better, with a view to understanding how you help to construct the world around you.

Together we can identify your patterns of relating to those around you, and in turn how others tend to respond to you. We will look at how you deal with the darker emotions such as anxiety, sadness and anger, and why this might be. If necessary, I can help you find ways to process these feelings in a more constructive way. We will explore your belief systems and the strategies you use to keep yourself emotionally safe, so that you can decide which still serve you well, and which may no longer be necessary or helpful. And I will support you as you develop a more compassionate relationship with yourself - by far the most important relationship we have.

But perhaps the most significant thing I can offer you is meaningful contact with another person who sometimes feels scared, anxious, jealous, sad, angry, guilty, disillusioned, lonely... it's hard to be human!

Why not come along for a chat and see how we can work together to make things better?

HOW MANY SESSIONS WILL I NEED?

This depends on so many factors. If after an initial session we decide we're a good fit, I usually suggest we start by meeting once a week for six weeks. After this time you may feel you would like a break to consolidate your experience, or you may feel you'd like to stop. Most people however, decide to continue on a weekly, fortnightly, or as-and-when basis. I try to work as flexibly as possible to accommodate your needs, time and budget.

WHAT DOES IT COST?

£65 per 50-minute session*. Please note that a 50% cancellation fee is always charged, regardless of the reason, for sessions cancelled or missed with less than 48 hours' notice. *Concessions are sometimes available - please ask.

WHERE ARE YOU BASED?

My office is close to the train station in Surbiton.

Surbiton is a 20-minute train journey from London Waterloo.

HOW CAN I CONTACT YOU?

Please email bensonamymay@icloud.com

Update September 2024: unfortunately my practice is currently full and I am not able to take new enquiries.

WHAT BRINGS YOU HERE?

There are so many reasons why people come to therapy.
Issues I frequently work with include (but are not limited to):

Anxiety
Depression
Bereavement & loss (incl. baby loss)
Relationship problems (incl. affairs and relationship breakdowns)
'Mid-life crises'
Parenting concerns (incl. becoming a parent, antenatal anxiety and post-natal depression)
Low self-esteem
Emotional numbness
Feeling stuck or frozen
Being 'the bad guy'
Feelings of shame
A sense of repeating the same old mistakes
Struggles around gender, sex and sexuality
Hopelessness
Low mood without knowing the cause
Life 'ennui'
Struggles with finding meaning/purpose
Difficulty managing anger
Feeling different/separate to others
Self-sabotaging behaviour
Stress
Loneliness

ABOUT ME

I've been a fully qualified counsellor since 2009 and currently divide my time between my private practice in Surbiton (and online) and my work at St Thomas' Hospital in London with PETALS, where I support parents who have suffered a stillbirth, late miscarriage or neo-natal loss.

I am an accredited member of the British Association For Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP) and I adhere to its Ethical Framework. I am also on the Professional Standards Authority Accredited Register, and my work is supervised by an experienced practitioner. All client identities are, of course, kept anonymous.

My training and counselling style is integrative, which means I can draw on a range of psychological approaches to best support you. These include working with parts (where we get to know the different parts of you that are often in conflict with each other, so that you can develop a stronger, more peaceful relationship within yourself); psychodynamic (where our childhood experiences continue to influence our adult responses, often out of our awareness); person-centred (where a non-prescriptive, warm, non-judgmental and authentic relationship between you and I can be sufficient for healing), CBT (which focuses on our behaviour, challenges the meaning we attribute to thoughts, and offers practical techniques for coping with anxiety, depression, paranoia, low self-esteem and so on); and existential (an exploration into how you give meaning to, and make sense of, your own life).

When it comes to effective counselling however, I believe that above all it's the quality of the relationship between you and I that will be the most important factor in facilitating change. It's really important that you feel comfortable with your choice of therapist, and for that reason I would encourage you to try out a few of us.

QUALIFICATIONS & FURTHER TRAINING

First Class Honours degree in Integrative-Relational Counselling

Cert. HE in Counselling & Counselling Skills

OCN Certificate in Counselling Supervision

I am also informed in Emotionally Focussed Therapy (EFT) and Internal Family Systems (IFS)